We are not disturbed by things, but by the view which we take of them”.
When you look in the mirror, what do you say to yourself? Do you say “Hey Hi Me!” or do you, like most of us, criticize what you see? I don’t know why I struggle with this so much. I am all about love and loving oneself and yet I always get caught off guard when I look in a mirror.
Is it a brain thing? Does our brain have a critical eye that looks for changes and variances or maybe it expects to see a certain thing and then does get caught off guard. Just like I do when I remember I am 53 years old. How can that be??? I’m still a little kid! I seriously feel that way in my soul. I admit I am very childlike in my excitement for life and I tend to see the world through childlike eyes …. which I think is awesome btw 🙂
Whatever the reason I just want to get to the place where I look in the mirror and say “Hi Beautiful, how’s it going today? EnJOYing life? Great!”
A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.
christopher k. germer
Yesterday, while thrift store shopping, I was lucky enough to pick up a copy of Brene Brown’s book “The Gifts of Imperfection” Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.
Although I haven’t read it yet, I have been skimming some of the pages and it is definitely resonating with me. I am reminded once again that we are not in this alone. We all suffer from the same things, self-doubt, insecurities, fear, lack of self-confidence and more. We are NOT alone! You, me and the stranger across the road, we’ve all been here or are here right now.
I write about self-love and compassion often and it seems for good reason. We can be so hard on ourselves. As I write this, I am glancing over at my cat Bella, curled up in a chair and I realize that when I look at Bella so cute like that, I instantly feel this emotion that I would call compassion. Why? I am not sure. I don’t need to be compassionate to her or for her but for some reason that emotion comes to mind. It makes me think that we all have compassion in us but being compassionate to ourselves often seems so challenging.
In my quest of getting a better understanding of compassion I found these synonyms:
The two that jumped out at me the most, were soft-heartedness and warm-heartedness. Yes this is what I feel when I look at Bella all cuddled up over on that chair. My heart is warm and melting and I just want to go over there and kiss her or cuddle her.
What if we could look in the mirror and feel that way about ourselves? Would it have an impact? I think it would. And I think if we felt that way towards ourselves we would open up our capacity to feel these tender feelings toward others and then the whole world benefits just like the starfish story, one starfish at a time. 🙂
I hope you take the time to practice compassion and self-love for yourself today and always. I am going to start right away. Just writing this post has helped me to see the gift in compassion and to feel it’s power to shift and to heal. Will you join me? I would love to hear also what synonyms for compassion resonated with you or jumped out at you? 🙂
Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach & Certified Infinite Possibilities Trainer & Coach who loves to write as a way of expressing her feelings. She thanks you for taking the time today to stop by and spend a moment with her in her heart and soul.
Help me to remember that everyone I encounter is a child of God who will respond to pure LOVE”.
Alan cohen from his book “a breath of life”
Sometimes I turn to books for inspiration for my daily writing and to boost my own soul at the same time. Today I was drawn to this book from Alan Cohen. I had the pleasure of meeting Alan at a seminar he was speaking at and I was attending last November in Honolulu, Hawaii. I thoroughly enJOYed meeting him and listening to him speak. He exuberates the very definition of LOVE.
Here is a picture of the two of us. 🙂 Of course when I looked at this picture today, I was criticizing myself that I needed a hair cut in this picture, I was looking at my double chin or was it a triple chin lol etc. etc. There was a lot I could find ‘wrong’ with this picture…….
And then I stopped myself and said “Wait, Maggie this is not loving yourself, which is the whole point of this blog post. Love ourselves and one another and we will respond to this pure LOVE!
To help with this, I am working at being even more ME. I am actually challenging myself to do this through more self acceptance, realness, rawness, and even video! LOL! If you have ever worked at doing videos of yourself, you know what I mean. 🙂
Tomorrow I will be a guest over on Elevated Radio and will be talking about this very thing. It is going to be about owning our own voices and being who we are, which sounds delightful doesn’t it? 🙂
I must confess that I just reread this blog post, as I do often, while composing posts, and I had to stop because I got teary eyed. I got teary eyed with the realization that most of us, including myself, have a deep seated fear of just being ‘who we are’. I know some of you reading this, who are my coaching clients for example, might not realize this about me or you might, but either way, I too suffer from this! And this is why I am challenging myself to be more me everyday and to share that with the world. Will you join me? 🙂
Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Board Certified Nutritionist who more importantly is a human being having a spiritual experience as she makes her own way through life, hoping she impacts others positively while co-creating on this beautiful journey of many souls.
This morning I found myself mentally beating myself up. You all know what I am talking about right? The old being disappointed in ourselves for something we did or did not do, said, did not say, etc.
Here’s what I did when I caught myself. I said to myself “Maggie this is what makes you human and that’s beautiful”. Once I remembered that I was human and beautiful, I instantly had compassion for myself and then I stopped the madness. It kind of stopped me in my tracks and reminded me that beating myself up does not serve me! 🙂
Okay that’s it for this blog post. Short and Sweet. Hope it helps you stop the madness if you tend to berate yourself or beat yourself up. Carry on fellow humans. 🙂
Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Nutritionist who is very much human and plugging along at the game of life, just like everyone. She wishes you more JOY and more Self-Love and please, please, remember to be your own best friend! 🙂
Feelings are our road to recovery, our road to peace and well-being. When we are in a space of quiet despair or unrest, we can use our feelings to guide us back to peace and even to hopefulness.
By drawing our attention and intention to thoughts that center around gratitude and love, we can tip the scales from fear to love, or to peace within. If we stopped to truly contemplate the compilation of life’s moments that comprise a lifetime, I am sure we would desire that the moments consisted of harmonious energies and thoughts that served our highest good, verses those that were negative and self-destructive. I am sure at the end of our lives we would wonder why we wasted one precious second or moment in a fear based space.
It is not always easy to love ourselves fully in every moment, but the more we shift our focus to the feelings of gratitude and well-being, the easier it becomes.
The other thing that happens is we develop a deeper compassion and understanding for others travelling along on this earthly journey. Judgement of ourselves and others is a barrier to freedom and to peace of mind. Try taking just one moment now to release yourself from self condemnation or self-judgement. Have compassion for yourself and in turn you cast compassion on others.
We are all doing the best we can and learning and growing as we go. We all have slips and falls and brush ourselves off and get back up again.
I wish everyone, including myself, the freedom to let go of self defeating thoughts, memories, regrets, should haves, should have nots, and to move through the tunnel of love and towards self acceptance.
Let us all experience more moments of beauty, grace, and love in this orchestra of life expressing itself through us.