compassion, kindness, Self-care, self-love

Getting Through The Rough Spots in Life

I had a call from a coaching client looking for some quick tips to get him through a rough spot. For the sake of confidentiality I will call him “Ben”.

Ben called me and expressed that he was feeling inadequate in his life, in his job, and as a provider to his family.

We chatted for a while and I suggested to Ben that he be more gentle on himself and that he talk to himself as a best friend would do. I asked him what he would say to the 5 year old version of himself? He responded with something like “you will have to figure a way out of this”.

I suggested that he might say things like:

I’ve got your back.

I’m here for you.

It’s not as bad as it seems.

Together we will get through this.

I also suggested to Ben that if he could work at getting excited about what the future holds, it could help him bridge himself from his painful present. Sometimes we need a bridge to transition us and I have found that focusing on the prospect of a brighter future is sometimes better than ‘being in the Now’ when the Now is painful.

In reflecting after the call, I realized that if Ben could find JOY in his current job and life, he could give his family a gift better than he could imagine in his mind. He was worried about being a good provider, Dad, and husband. But imagine if he could show them that he can have JOY and appreciation for the work he does have currently. It would be a far greater gift for his family than seeing the weight of the world on his shoulders.

And when we shift our frequency from pain to comfort, we can start attracting more of that which is good and is a better opportunity or a better fit for us.

I hope you may find this helpful for getting through the rough spots inlife and if you need help with kindness and tenderness for yourself, this blog post I did recently may help you as well. Here is the link:
https://maggiesvitamins.blog/2019/04/23/tenderness-kindness/

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Be happy with what you have while working for what you want.

Anonymous

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Speaker, Workshop Facilitator and Blogger, who loves to make people feel better by using her words to uplift, inspire and shift frequencies from Fear to LOvE!

Self Esteem, self-love

Be YourSELF!

Be Yourself by Maggie Holbik.com

“To thine own self be true”says Polonius in Hamlet. Very wise words indeed!

Yesterday as I was preparing for my guest appearance over on Elevated Radio today, talking about “owning our own voice and being who we are“, I came up with this acronym and thought it was pretty darn good. I know I sure will be keeping this handy to remind myself to just be ‘Me’. 🙂

Be YourSELF YourSELF = Your Own Unique Real SELF

As of late, the topic of being real, raw, and authentic is a hot one in my world. I am personally working at getting better at this. In fact, I am challenging myself!

Yesterday a client and I were discussing through FB my blog post from yesterday where I was talking about judging and criticizing myself in my picture of myself. She mentioned she did it too! I said that I think we all do and then I sent her this:

Here was her response to me:

I answered her with IKR? (I know right) :-). But when I really thought about this, I thought I am onto something here. If I/we can challenge ourselves to put ourselves out there in a raw and real way, it will just get easier and then I can see the scales flipping! The more comfortable we get, the more we accept ourselves, the more we LOVE ourselves, and the more we are truly, truly, FREE.

FREE to be us! FREE to be comfortable with who we are. FREE to share our gifts with the world.

Now how awesome would that be? Let’s do it, shall we? 🙂

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Board Certified Nutritionist who has a passion to help people to share their authentic selves with the world. She wants to see everyone sharing their gifts, being free to be THEM, shining their lights and living with passion!

Contact Maggie to join her email list or with any questions you might have.

Elevated Radio, love, self-love

Pure Raw and Real Love

Help me to remember that everyone I encounter is a child of God who will respond to pure LOVE”.

Alan cohen from his book “a breath of life”

Sometimes I turn to books for inspiration for my daily writing and to boost my own soul at the same time. Today I was drawn to this book from Alan Cohen. I had the pleasure of meeting Alan at a seminar he was speaking at and I was attending last November in Honolulu, Hawaii. I thoroughly enJOYed meeting him and listening to him speak. He exuberates the very definition of LOVE.

Here is a picture of the two of us. 🙂 Of course when I looked at this picture today, I was criticizing myself that I needed a hair cut in this picture, I was looking at my double chin or was it a triple chin lol etc. etc. There was a lot I could find ‘wrong’ with this picture…….

Alan Cohen and Maggie Holbik
At the Soulapalooza conference in Honolulu, Hawaii, November, 2018

And then I stopped myself and said “Wait, Maggie this is not loving yourself, which is the whole point of this blog post. Love ourselves and one another and we will respond to this pure LOVE!

Wow! Eureka!….

To help with this, I am working at being even more ME. I am actually challenging myself to do this through more self acceptance, realness, rawness, and even video! LOL! If you have ever worked at doing videos of yourself, you know what I mean. 🙂

Tomorrow I will be a guest over on Elevated Radio and will be talking about this very thing. It is going to be about owning our own voices and being who we are, which sounds delightful doesn’t it? 🙂

Here is a link for the show if you would like to listen in or catch the replay.
https://elevatedradiofm.com/shows/owning-your-voice-being-you/

If you would like to listen to my prior 10 minute guest spot over at Elevated radio, here is the link for that.
https://elevatedradiofm.com/shows-archive/maggie-holbik-3-28-19/?fbclid=IwAR3xVlMntSoKVYsm6-wOrMAnCSN8qdS5gk-odL-qPoQHxR8Wyy5lx0TUHT8

I must confess that I just reread this blog post, as I do often, while composing posts, and I had to stop because I got teary eyed. I got teary eyed with the realization that most of us, including myself, have a deep seated fear of just being ‘who we are’. I know some of you reading this, who are my coaching clients for example, might not realize this about me or you might, but either way, I too suffer from this! And this is why I am challenging myself to be more me everyday and to share that with the world. Will you join me? 🙂

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Board Certified Nutritionist who more importantly is a human being having a spiritual experience as she makes her own way through life, hoping she impacts others positively while co-creating on this beautiful journey of many souls.

compassion, kindess, self-love

3 Ways to Be More Compassionate & How It Can Free YOU!

As of late, I seem to be lead to the words compassion and compassionate. I myself, am working diligently at being more compassionate and less judgmental which quite honestly is a work in progress. The cool thing though, is I am realizing that the more compassionate I am, the less I suffer. Wow. Think about that one for a moment…..

The More Compassionate We Are, The Less WE Suffer

The more compassionate we are, the less WE suffer. I don’t know about you, but I’m in. 🙂

Just imagine a scenario where and when you might be judging someone without compassion. Maybe it’s judging the acts of a parent from your childhood, or a situation you witnessed at the park, or someone who declares that they are a supporter of a certain cause, or way of being, and you witness the opposite, or the grumpy store clerk that you want to judge and give the evil eye to. You know this list. It’s endless.

When I was a teenager, I had an ‘experience’ which I will now call a spiritual experience. It was made known to me that I was here on earth to learn to “Love and Not Judge”. I mostly forgot about this for much of my life, but lately I am getting gentle nudges to remember this and to act upon it. These reminders come through movies like the one I watched the other day called “The Shack”, which I really en-JOY-ed and recommend. It’s now on Netflix.

Reminders also come from watching the pains of those I love and my own pains as we go through life and we interact with those around us. I am reminded to let go of being the ‘judger‘. I know not why people do what they do and really it does not matter. The only thing I know for sure is that LOVE does heal all wounds, and true healing love is unconditional. Maybe not always in this lifetime for everyone, but it is possible and that gives me HOPE. There is always HOPE.

The Less We Judge Others, The More Peaceful WE Are!

What I also know for sure, is that the less I judge, the more peaceful I am and the more peaceful those I encounter are. Who likes to be judged? It’s an awful feeling. It’s like when you have someone come into your home and tell you what you should get rid of, or that you don’t need something, or you do need something, or you shouldn’t wear a certain piece of clothing because of xyz, or you should lose weight, or you should gain weight, or you should quit smoking, or you should stop this behavior or that behavior, or you should be this way or that way, or you should have said this or you shouldn’t have said that. It truly feels like an invasion of self and soul and it makes one very vulnerable.

Start With Self & Then Expand

We all know that having compassion for oneself is the ultimate compassion mountain to climb. I can be very hard on myself, just like the clients I coach who tell me how hard they are on themselves, so I know it’s not just me. I think we all struggle with this one because we are so afraid of self betrayal and truly struggle with loving ourselves and knowing that we are worthy. The secret here, is that if there is no judgement, worth does not even come into question!!!!! Wowsa! Amazing! Eureka! Something to think on and ponder on very deeply……

I am bearing witness to the many ways I judge and I am working on getting better at it. I am sorry to all those who I have passed judgement on and yet I am compassionate for myself for doing so. The exciting thing about all of this, is that awareness moves us forward. I am excited to work on having more compassion and I understand that all journeys involve steps, but they all start with the first….

I hope you found some comfort in this writing and I would love to hear your comments on how you have found more compassion in your life. That is another thing that I have learned, we don’t have to do it all alone…. being together on the journey provides comfort as well.

Blessings to all of you reading this. Blessings sent to others are of the highest and most compassionate frequency available to us. It’s like LOVE at its utmost, so many, many BLESSINGS sent to you, right now, right in this moment as YOU read this words.

With Much Love,

Maggie

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Board Certified Nutritionist and human being who is trying to remember to have more compassion and to forgive self and others quickly and easily so she can make space for more LOVE in her life and in the lives of those around her.


“The only way out of the labyrinth of suffering is to forgive.”

john green

Authenticity, Awakening, Insight, Joy, Self-Discovery, self-love

Authenticity

While looking up the Webster’s definition of authenticity, I picked this one as my favorite. Number 3 of course. 🙂

3 : true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character
is sincere and authentic with no pretensions

We hear this word a lot out there today. It’s all about being authentic and I couldn’t agree more! It’s where it’s at! It’s the place to be!

I thought today I would write a little about what it means to me, when I think of us being authentic. Authentic people have the strength and the courage to be true to themselves and to be who they are. They embrace their uniqueness and know that it is in fact their gift!

Authentic people are honest, vulnerable, intimate, unique, bold, daring, passionate and real. They are brave enough to share a piece of themselves with the world. They are strong enough to bare their soul and to let it shine!

You see authentic people in the world with labels like artists, creators, musicians, authors, poets, rebels, free spirits, the givers, the lovers, the cooks, the bakers, and the candlestick makers. Everywhere you look you see them. 🙂

There is a tender and vulnerable side to authenticity too. It involves approaching life with sincerity, honesty, openness, and vulnerability.

And then there is the daring side of authenticity that involves boldness, greatness, and glory!

Whatever words you attach to it, I wish for you the JOY of being and living through your authentic self. We are all here to discover our gifts and authentically share them with each other. May you live the beautiful and authentic life of your dreams and desires!

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Board Certified Nutritionist and lover of life! She has claimed her authenticity and loves using words to inspire, uplift and empower others in the world.

Grieving, Holidays, Joy, Life Coaching, Life's Challenges, love, self-love

Are The Holidays a Challenge For You?

“All human life has its seasons and cycles, and no one’s personal chaos can be permanent. Winter, after all, gives way to spring and summer, though sometimes when branches stay dark and the earth cracks with ice, one thinks they will never come, that spring, and that summer, but they do, and always.: — Truman Capote.

Is this a hard time of year for you? Maybe you’ve lost a loved one or multiple loved ones or maybe you are alone, or you have had health issues, or this year has been very challenging for you. Whatever the case may be, remember that the sun always sets and better yet, it always rises again. There is always the HOPE of a new day, a new season and a new reason to keep the faith that things will get better.

Here are some ideas to help you shift your sadness, loneliness or pain.

When you are thinking of your loved ones that you have lost, why not try focusing on the beautiful and happy memories and ALLOW yourself to smile about them? They would want that. They would be saying, “Please, please, enjoy yourself, it’s my greatest wish for you!” Sometimes we think we are supposed to feel bad about them not being there and although it’s okay to miss them and grieve, it’s okay to have JOY from the memories that make our heart smile, and to en-JOY where we are now and who is in our lives now.

I too have suffered loss. By the age of 29, I had lost both parents and a soulmate in a 3 year time frame. Do I miss them? Yes, but I am also over-JOYED at the people in my life today, and even more empowered to make sure I make the most of the time that I have left. I have no time to waste and am grateful to be alive.

One of the best ways to rise out of our pain, is to give what you are looking for. If you are lonely maybe reach out to someone else and send a kind word, or make a phone call, or send a lovely message on social media to tell them that they are thought of at this time. What we give out, we truly get back tenfold! Give Love and you will get Love back. Give Kindness and you will get Kindness back. Give a helping hand and you will get a full heart. Be the love you seek and it shall seek you!.

I want to personally wish everyone reading this a Happy Holiday, or just a Happy Day today, whenever you are reading this. I wish for you more JOY, more LOVE and more LIFE!

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Nutritionist who has tears running down her face right now for YOU and for everyone with a heavy heart…. She wishes for all …. Happy and JOYOUS hearts today and always and in all ways!

self-love, Self-Talk

Don’t Beat Yourself Up!

This morning I found myself mentally beating myself up. You all know what I am talking about right? The old being disappointed in ourselves for something we did or did not do, said, did not say, etc.

Here’s what I did when I caught myself. I said to myself “Maggie this is what makes you human and that’s beautiful”. Once I remembered that I was human and beautiful, I instantly had compassion for myself and then I stopped the madness. It kind of stopped me in my tracks and reminded me that beating myself up does not serve me! 🙂

Okay that’s it for this blog post. Short and Sweet. Hope it helps you stop the madness if you tend to berate yourself or beat yourself up. Carry on fellow humans. 🙂

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Nutritionist who is very much human and plugging along at the game of life, just like everyone. She wishes you more JOY and more Self-Love and please, please, remember to be your own best friend! 🙂

Awakening, love life, self-love

Comparing Ourselves to Others

Question:

My two closest friends are really beautiful, always have boys around them and are charismatic. Meanwhile I’m the exact opposite. I can’t help feeling envious and bad about myself. How can I change this?

I answered this question over on another platform and thought it was worth sharing here as well. So here was my answer:

First know that you are not alone. We all have feelings of insecurity and unworthiness at times in our lives. In fact, as a Life Coach, this is the thing I see most with people. They truly do not love themselves enough, and do not feel personally empowered to be who they really are.

I would encourage you to become your own best friend! What would a best friend say to themselves? What would best friends say to each other? Would they encourage each other? Would they support each other? YES they would!

I wish I had learned to love myself earlier in my life. I do now. 100% but I went through a lot to get here. You do not have to! Things can happen “in an Instant” just like sending an email or a text message and it shows up instantly. I wrote a blog post about this and you or someone may find it helpful. Here is the link: The Art of Instant Forgiveness

Whether it’s self-love, self-acceptance or self forgiveness it truly can happen instantly if we ‘change our minds’ about it. So here is the greatest secret to shifting your feelings. Focus on the things that you do love about yourself and get excited about those. We all have some things that we do love.. maybe our laugh, our kindness to animals, etc. There is always something to be grateful for. When we get grateful we shift our energetic frequency from envy to JOY and JOY is where we want to be.

I wish you nothing but Happiness and JOY and I hope you get excited about being YOU and en-JOYing the beautiful gift that you are to the world. Blessings!

MaggieHolbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and Nutritionist who en-JOYs instilling JOY in others. Life can be beautiful if we decide so.

 

 

forgiveness, healing, self-love

The Art of Instant Forgiveness

A person reads alone in the morning forest

Anita Moorjani, author of “Dying to be Me” and more recently “What if THIS is Heaven”, on a recent FB Live Video had shared the concept of Self-Love rather than Self-Sacrifice. We are all good in the self-sacrifice department, but many of us fall down in the self-love arena, wouldn’t you agree?

I think the message of more self-love is an ever-important message, especially for the women of the world, who tend to take care of the needs of everyone else first and foremost.

One of the ways I personally am trying to practice self-love is by applying personal forgiveness. For example, when I have a thought such as I should not have said that, or did I really do that, or whatever thought that pops to mind that causes me feelings of unworthiness, regret, guilt, or shame, etc., I try to apply what I now call “Instant Forgiveness”.

Lately I have been getting a profound understanding of the power of ‘in an instant’. This most likely stems from technology as in sending an email or a photo from one of my devices and seeing it received on another, at what seems to be the exact same time or instant. The witnessing of this has opened my mind and instilled a knowing in me that things can indeed happen instantly. I have come to believe that healing, forgiveness or letting go of something whether it’s a thought, a belief or a pattern does not have to be a long drawn out process. We can forgive ourselves in an instant if we make that our intention. Just think of that email sent across the world, in an instant and you know anything is possible… in an instant. 🙂

Everyday I am working on ways to practice more self-love. One of the best ways I have found is to take time to read from books like Anita’s current book, “What is THIS were Heaven?”. One of my favorite quotes from the book so far, is a message that was given to her when she found she had once again gotten lost in everyone’s pain and the woes of the world. It goes like this “Remember your only work is to love yourself, value yourself, and embody the truth of self-worth and self-love so that you can be love in action. That is true service, to yourself and to those around you.”

So today I leave you with the concept of “Instant Forgiveness” for yourself and others because the moment we forgive, we give to ourselves the gift of the release of pain and suffering. Let us forgive instantly and often so we can be the love that the world so needs right now.  Will you join me by practicing Instant Forgiveness and more Self-Love? Let’s do it for the world, shall we? 🙂

Maggie Holbik is a Life & Business Coach who believes that if you love life, if will love you back… now that’s the magic.