compassion, kindness, self-love

Compassion For Self

A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.

christopher k. germer

Yesterday, while thrift store shopping, I was lucky enough to pick up a copy of Brene Brown’s book “The Gifts of Imperfection” Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.

Although I haven’t read it yet, I have been skimming some of the pages and it is definitely resonating with me. I am reminded once again that we are not in this alone. We all suffer from the same things, self-doubt, insecurities, fear, lack of self-confidence and more. We are NOT alone! You, me and the stranger across the road, we’ve all been here or are here right now.

I write about self-love and compassion often and it seems for good reason. We can be so hard on ourselves. As I write this, I am glancing over at my cat Bella, curled up in a chair and I realize that when I look at Bella so cute like that, I instantly feel this emotion that I would call compassion. Why? I am not sure. I don’t need to be compassionate to her or for her but for some reason that emotion comes to mind. It makes me think that we all have compassion in us but being compassionate to ourselves often seems so challenging.

In my quest of getting a better understanding of compassion I found these synonyms:

pity, sympathy, feeling, fellow feeling, empathy, understanding, care, concern, solicitude, solicitousness, sensitivity, tender-heartedness, soft-heartedness, warm-heartedness, warmth, love, brotherly love, tenderness, gentleness, mercy, mercifulness, leniency, lenience, tolerance,  consideration, kindness, humanity, humaneness, kind-heartedness, charity, benevolence

The two that jumped out at me the most, were soft-heartedness and warm-heartedness. Yes this is what I feel when I look at Bella all cuddled up over on that chair. My heart is warm and melting and I just want to go over there and kiss her or cuddle her.

What if we could look in the mirror and feel that way about ourselves? Would it have an impact? I think it would. And I think if we felt that way towards ourselves we would open up our capacity to feel these tender feelings toward others and then the whole world benefits just like the starfish story, one starfish at a time. ๐Ÿ™‚

I hope you take the time to practice compassion and self-love for yourself today and always. I am going to start right away. Just writing this post has helped me to see the gift in compassion and to feel it’s power to shift and to heal. Will you join me? I would love to hear also what synonyms for compassion resonated with you or jumped out at you? ๐Ÿ™‚

Wishing you a day full of JOY and Compassion……

With Love,

Maggie

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach & Certified Infinite Possibilities Trainer & Coach who loves to write as a way of expressing her feelings. She thanks you for taking the time today to stop by and spend a moment with her in her heart and soul.

compassion, Gentleness, kindness

Hard Times….

It has been awhile since I have made a blog post. I just haven’t been inspired but now I realize that it’s all ok and that blogging involves sharing through the highs and lows of life.

There seems to be so much sadness around lately and so many people going through extremely trying times… all the cycles of life and of life and death.

Yesterday we lost a very precious woman who was close to my heart, Pam Bowling, Pam was a mentor to me in business, a business partner and a friend. She was an amazing lady and I will honor her memory always. Pam was very much an entrepreneur like myself. Pam held me in the light always and encouraged me and my entire team onto success and I am forever grateful for that. In memory of Pam I will continue to forge ahead and to also help others on their journeys of creating and designing lives that bring them freedom….. to love, to grow, to inspire, to dream and to create lives that allow them to make the most of their time here on earth.

Pam was beautiful inside and out and if you knew her, you loved her!

While contemplating all of the heavy hearts and toil I see and feel going on around me, the only word that keeps coming to mind is “kindness”. Kindness, Kindness, Kindness. We need to be kind to each other, we need to be kind to ourselves and to be gentle with ourselves and others.

Kindness is that part of love that reaches out and offers support in times of need. Kindness is the thread of hope that bridges the gaps between pain and suffering. Kindness is the glue that helps to heal the holes created by loss. Kindness is a gift……

The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose.  

hada Bejar

If you are reading this and need support or comfort, please know that love and kindness are sent your way today.

And to Pam…. I know you are now an angel for many of us and I feel you as the wind beneath my wings…..

kindness, love, loving kindness, paul luftenegger.

Love. Live. Love

Often I am commenting on posts that I really, really, like and I like put “Love, Love, Love!” in the comments to show how much I like it. ๐Ÿ™‚

The interesting thing is that almost all the time, I misspell one of the Loves and it goes something like this. “Love, Live, Love”. And I say to myself something like “oh I made a mistake” but my heart always says “No, it’s perfect!” Love, Live, Love!!!

I got to thinking about this and it is so true! If we don’t have love in our lives, especially for ourselves, we cannot truly live! We are comprised of love. Every cell in our body is and came from love and will return to love. Today in my morning meditation I saw every cell in my body as littles tiny hearts. โค โค โค It was a great visual.

If we want to fast tract our lives to a JOYous journey here on earth or to a blissful state, then we need to fast track our love of self.

This morning when I opened FB I saw a this beautiful post from my friend Paul Luftenger. Paul is a Multi Award Winning Published Singer Songwriter In 120+ Countries

“Paul Writes, Sings, and Composes Conscious Music To Inspire Global Love & Kindness From Within โ€“ Powerful Conscious Music Always Supporting The Heart & Soul To Feel and Know Its Beauty and Divine Holy Worth From The Inside Out!”

Paul is one of my favorite people and in his FB post this morning he wrote this. I can’t help but share it here because it is on point:

From Paul’s FB Post:

“What I wish all human beings on earth knew today.

To be kind and gentle and loving to oneself.

To stop pointing fingers at others by embracing the light of love and kindness from within oneself.

I have learned that the real pain of the world comes from one place…the space within oneself projected out on others without regard or responsibility of one’s own energy or vibration. It is the biggest lie ever told.

Healthy people have healthy hearts and healthy souls; they don’t harm others โ€“ but rather embrace the self healing process from within oneself.

I have learned in my 42 years of being human that the one person that has to be loved and forgiven is the hardest person to fully embrace and love, and that is oneself.

I use to be so hard on him.

I use to tell him he couldn’t sing or dance or be free.

I use to scold him for being scared.

I use to belittle him for all the stupid choices he had made.

I use to tell him he was weak.

I use to feel he wasn’t smart enough…. or that he was too stupid or too pathetic or too gay or too ugly…..until one day I embraced him for all the things he was…it came to be known after I prayed to God for help on the day my father hung himself….I was shown by God to love the spark of God that he was…. for he was shown that he was a piece of God….. and I began to love the child he once was… the gift to the world he had forgotten he was and day by day his light began to be brighter….and brighter….and brighter.

That precious child within me healed all of my wounds with God’s pure loving grace through letting go and taking the knife away from his own throat.

Each time I cried to God in my darkness, I begged God to show me the way…and God did.

Each day God picked me up out of the mud and pain and shame of my life and showed me I could shine my light. Some people hated me for it… some told me I wasn’t good enough and tried to destroy me….some people discarded me for it… but each day God showed my that my soul was meant to shine and that those who were cruel to me, like me, had forgotten that they could shine from their heart and soul too.

I loved that precious little boy in me whole again with God’s pure love, and the stains of the self hatred started to disappear and vanish from within me…. I began to self illuminate my life from my heart and soul working together reminding others of the light within them.

That little boy is now a man…and one I am so proud to be. When I look at myself in the mirror now, I see all the love that my heart and soul was able to spread.

I have learned that love really is the superpower in the world and it begins with obeying God and trusting and having faith in his way…

Love your enemy, and obey God, by loving yourself again…. by being honest and responsible for the energy you create by being the heart and soul that is within you.

You are not what the world told you you are. You are free of all of that once you claim it.

This is what I know for sure.

Love.

Love…

Love… and be kind to the little boy or the little girl within you.”

Paul Luftenegger

Well that was a beautiful way to start my day. Reading Paul’s post and then I commented with my famous typo “Love, Live, Love”, which seemed perfect, of course, and led me to this blog post. Everything is divinely perfect when we open to the flow of universal LOVE.

Have an amazing day everyone. I send you nothing but LOVE and I hope you LIVE LOVE today.

โค โค โค

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Pysch-K Facilitator & Infinite Possibilities Trainer & Coach who trained directly under Mike Dooley. Mike Dooley is a New York Times Bestselling author, speaker, and entrepreneur in the philosophical New Thought movement. His teachings contain the premise that our “thoughts become things,” an expression he made popular in Rhonda Byrne’s book and video documentary on the Law of Attraction, The Secret.

forgiveness, Forgiving, kindness, self-love

The Power of For-GIVE-Ness

Lately I have been pondering on both the word and the power of forgiveness. When you break the word down, it is really about giving. What do we give when we forgive?

We give love, hope, compassion, empathy, and we hold space for healing. Now this can be for others or for ourselves. I have come to a place where I am pretty comfortable in the forgiveness department when it comes to others because I figured it out long ago, when I forgive I feel better. I’m pretty selfish that way LOL!

However, forgiving oneself sometimes takes on a daily challenge. A few weeks ago I was thinking what if we looked at each day as a chance to forGIVE ourselves each day like a goal! Like we get to GIVE ourselves some LOVE and COMPASSION. ๐Ÿ™‚ โค โค โค

When I looked at it this way, I started to kind of like it. It was like okay, let’s bring on some forgiveness here for myself for whatever. This is a good thing. Again selfish, I know. My bad. ๐Ÿ™‚

My spiritual and soul self knows that there is nothing to forgive, which is cool too, but my human self falls into the humanness stuff, so I work at forgiving myself when necessary. I kind of look at it this way, the sooner I forgive the faster I can raise my frequency and be a light for others, so I just do it now. Of course, some days are easier than others and on a lot of days there is no need, but when the occasion arises to forgive, I try and take it. ๐Ÿ™‚

I like the words of Marissa Peer “To make mistakes is human but to forGIVE yourself is divine.”

I think one of the greatest gifts we can give our children and our loved ones, or anyone in our lives really, is the example of the ability to forgive. It is a gift that is like non other. I hope that you take an opportunity today to forGIVE yourself if you feel you need to and to enJOY the gift that the experience offers.

In Love & Light,

Maggie

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach and an Certified Infinite Possibilities Trainer who loves to free herself and others from anything that causes us to suffer unnecessarily and causes pain, especially if that suffering blocks us from JOY. Maggie believes that we are deliberate creators here on earth and that JOY and LOVE are our birthrights.

Feel free to reach out to Maggie or request to be on her email list.

abundance, Divine Signs, kindness, love

Signs, Signs & More Signs

I swear I couldnโ€™t love โค you more than I do right now, and yet I know I will tomorrow.

leo christopher

I love when things flow. This morning I keep seeing messages about Love and I Love that! ๐Ÿ™‚ pun intended! โค โค โค

Here is one that I saw in a Daily Teachings from The Secret by Rhonda Byrne

“Our highest power is love, and it is one thing each of us has an unlimited amount of. How much love do you give to others in one day? Each day we have an opportunity to set out with this great, unlimited power in our possession, and pour it over every person and circumstance.

Love is appreciating, complimenting, feeling gratitude, and speaking good words to others.

We have so much love to give, and the more that we give, the more that we receive.”

*********************************

The last line is of course my favorite “the more that we give, the more that we receive”. It is such a simple formula and I use it often. Whatever I want more of, I give more of….. Love, JOY, Kindness, Compassion, Inspiration…. etc. etc. etc. I wish you all nothing but JOY and LOVE today and always and in all ways.

Maggie Holbik.com is a passionate Lover of Life who delights in inspiring others to Love Life and to show the world more Love and Kindness by opening their hearts and minds up to the Infinite Possibilities that Love has to offer.

kindness, loving kindness

Resolve to be Tender

Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, tolerant with the weak, and forgiving with the wrong. Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.

Lloyd Shearer
compassion, kindness, Self-care, self-love

Getting Through The Rough Spots in Life

I had a call from a coaching client looking for some quick tips to get him through a rough spot. For the sake of confidentiality I will call him “Ben”.

Ben called me and expressed that he was feeling inadequate in his life, in his job, and as a provider to his family.

We chatted for a while and I suggested to Ben that he be more gentle on himself and that he talk to himself as a best friend would do. I asked him what he would say to the 5 year old version of himself? He responded with something like “you will have to figure a way out of this”.

I suggested that he might say things like:

I’ve got your back.

I’m here for you.

It’s not as bad as it seems.

Together we will get through this.

I also suggested to Ben that if he could work at getting excited about what the future holds, it could help him bridge himself from his painful present. Sometimes we need a bridge to transition us and I have found that focusing on the prospect of a brighter future is sometimes better than ‘being in the Now’ when the Now is painful.

In reflecting after the call, I realized that if Ben could find JOY in his current job and life, he could give his family a gift better than he could imagine in his mind. He was worried about being a good provider, Dad, and husband. But imagine if he could show them that he can have JOY and appreciation for the work he does have currently. It would be a far greater gift for his family than seeing the weight of the world on his shoulders.

And when we shift our frequency from pain to comfort, we can start attracting more of that which is good and is a better opportunity or a better fit for us.

I hope you may find this helpful for getting through the rough spots inlife and if you need help with kindness and tenderness for yourself, this blog post I did recently may help you as well. Here is the link:
https://maggiesvitamins.blog/2019/04/23/tenderness-kindness/

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Be happy with what you have while working for what you want.

Anonymous

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Speaker, Workshop Facilitator and Blogger, who loves to make people feel better by using her words to uplift, inspire and shift frequencies from Fear to LOvE!

compassion, kindness, self-love

3 Ways to Be More Compassionate & How It Can Free YOU!

As of late, I seem to be lead to the words compassion and compassionate. I myself, am working diligently at being more compassionate and less judgmental which quite honestly is a work in progress. The cool thing though, is I am realizing that the more compassionate I am, the less I suffer. Wow. Think about that one for a moment…..

The More Compassionate We Are, The Less WE Suffer

The more compassionate we are, the less WE suffer. I don’t know about you, but I’m in. ๐Ÿ™‚

Just imagine a scenario where and when you might be judging someone without compassion. Maybe it’s judging the acts of a parent from your childhood, or a situation you witnessed at the park, or someone who declares that they are a supporter of a certain cause, or way of being, and you witness the opposite, or the grumpy store clerk that you want to judge and give the evil eye to. You know this list. It’s endless.

When I was a teenager, I had an ‘experience’ which I will now call a spiritual experience. It was made known to me that I was here on earth to learn to “Love and Not Judge”. I mostly forgot about this for much of my life, but lately I am getting gentle nudges to remember this and to act upon it. These reminders come through movies like the one I watched the other day called “The Shack”, which I really en-JOY-ed and recommend. It’s now on Netflix.

Reminders also come from watching the pains of those I love and my own pains as we go through life and we interact with those around us. I am reminded to let go of being the ‘judger‘. I know not why people do what they do and really it does not matter. The only thing I know for sure is that LOVE does heal all wounds, and true healing love is unconditional. Maybe not always in this lifetime for everyone, but it is possible and that gives me HOPE. There is always HOPE.

The Less We Judge Others, The More Peaceful WE Are!

What I also know for sure, is that the less I judge, the more peaceful I am and the more peaceful those I encounter are. Who likes to be judged? It’s an awful feeling. It’s like when you have someone come into your home and tell you what you should get rid of, or that you don’t need something, or you do need something, or you shouldn’t wear a certain piece of clothing because of xyz, or you should lose weight, or you should gain weight, or you should quit smoking, or you should stop this behavior or that behavior, or you should be this way or that way, or you should have said this or you shouldn’t have said that. It truly feels like an invasion of self and soul and it makes one very vulnerable.

Start With Self & Then Expand

We all know that having compassion for oneself is the ultimate compassion mountain to climb. I can be very hard on myself, just like the clients I coach who tell me how hard they are on themselves, so I know it’s not just me. I think we all struggle with this one because we are so afraid of self betrayal and truly struggle with loving ourselves and knowing that we are worthy. The secret here, is that if there is no judgement, worth does not even come into question!!!!! Wowsa! Amazing! Eureka! Something to think on and ponder on very deeply……

I am bearing witness to the many ways I judge and I am working on getting better at it. I am sorry to all those who I have passed judgement on and yet I am compassionate for myself for doing so. The exciting thing about all of this, is that awareness moves us forward. I am excited to work on having more compassion and I understand that all journeys involve steps, but they all start with the first….

I hope you found some comfort in this writing and I would love to hear your comments on how you have found more compassion in your life. That is another thing that I have learned, we don’t have to do it all alone…. being together on the journey provides comfort as well.

Blessings to all of you reading this. Blessings sent to others are of the highest and most compassionate frequency available to us. It’s like LOVE at its utmost, so many, many BLESSINGS sent to you, right now, right in this moment as YOU read this words.

With Much Love,

Maggie

Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Board Certified Nutritionist and human being who is trying to remember to have more compassion and to forgive self and others quickly and easily so she can make space for more LOVE in her life and in the lives of those around her.


โ€œThe only way out of the labyrinth of suffering is to forgive.โ€

john green

compassion, Don's Poems, kindness

The Mirror

A Poem by Don, year unknown

The Mirror

When I look at my neighbor, what do I see?

I see a person looking back at me.

Is the person I see compassionate and kind?

Are these the thoughts that go through my mind?

Do I see anger, loneliness and despair?

Does his life seem empty and full of fear?

Do I see Love, Beauty, and JOY?

Do I feel compassion and I don’t know why?

The thoughts that I have are who I must be…

Because the person I see, is a mirror of me.

Don Perry

compassion, kindness, Poems by Don, poetry

Kindness

A Poem by my Spouse and Friend, Don Perry

Kindness

In goodness and kindness, God made us like him,

So we can make a difference in this world we are in.

Be kind to the person with the different colored skin,

For he is your brother with the same feelings within.

Be kind to the beggar who begs night and day,

For we don’t know why his life is that way.

Be kind to the person who is having a bad day.

Forgive and don’t judge him for he words he might say.

Be kind with your words and things that you do,

And people will like it and duplicate you.

If we are all being kind in the things that we do and say,

We can change the world as we know it today.

Don Perry

January, 2001