Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, tolerant with the weak, and forgiving with the wrong. Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.Lloyd Shearer
I had a call from a coaching client looking for some quick tips to get him through a rough spot. For the sake of confidentiality I will call him “Ben”.
Ben called me and expressed that he was feeling inadequate in his life, in his job, and as a provider to his family.
We chatted for a while and I suggested to Ben that he be more gentle on himself and that he talk to himself as a best friend would do. I asked him what he would say to the 5 year old version of himself? He responded with something like “you will have to figure a way out of this”.
I suggested that he might say things like:
I’ve got your back.
I’m here for you.
It’s not as bad as it seems.
Together we will get through this.
I also suggested to Ben that if he could work at getting excited about what the future holds, it could help him bridge himself from his painful present. Sometimes we need a bridge to transition us and I have found that focusing on the prospect of a brighter future is sometimes better than ‘being in the Now’ when the Now is painful.
In reflecting after the call, I realized that if Ben could find JOY in his current job and life, he could give his family a gift better than he could imagine in his mind. He was worried about being a good provider, Dad, and husband. But imagine if he could show them that he can have JOY and appreciation for the work he does have currently. It would be a far greater gift for his family than seeing the weight of the world on his shoulders.
And when we shift our frequency from pain to comfort, we can start attracting more of that which is good and is a better opportunity or a better fit for us.
I hope you may find this helpful for getting through the rough spots inlife and if you need help with kindness and tenderness for yourself, this blog post I did recently may help you as well. Here is the link:
Be happy with what you have while working for what you want.Anonymous
Maggie Holbik.com is a Certified Life Coach, Speaker, Workshop Facilitator and Blogger, who loves to make people feel better by using her words to uplift, inspire and shift frequencies from Fear to LOvE!
When I look at my neighbor, what do I see?
I see a person looking back at me.
Is the person I see compassionate and kind?
Are these the thoughts that go through my mind?
Do I see anger, loneliness and despair?
Does his life seem empty and full of fear?
Do I see Love, Beauty, and JOY?
Do I feel compassion and I don’t know why?
The thoughts that I have are who I must be…
Because the person I see, is a mirror of me.
A Poem by my Spouse and Friend, Don Perry
In goodness and kindness, God made us like him,
So we can make a difference in this world we are in.
Be kind to the person with the different colored skin,
For he is your brother with the same feelings within.
Be kind to the beggar who begs night and day,
For we don’t know why his life is that way.
Be kind to the person who is having a bad day.
Forgive and don’t judge him for he words he might say.
Be kind with your words and things that you do,
And people will like it and duplicate you.
If we are all being kind in the things that we do and say,
We can change the world as we know it today.